It was the final event of a week-long incredible journey as part of the Shamanic Sexual Experience with the School of Temple Arts: a re-birthing ceremony. I was surrounded by the women of my ‘pod’; me at the centre of a circle, ready for my birth.
“What type of womb do you want?” they asked. How wonderful, I get to choose my womb! “I want it dark, as dark as possible. I want to birth all of me, from the deepest depths of my shadows and bring it all into the light. I want it to be the darkest hell. I am going to birth it all, bring it all with me in love.”
They tied a black blindfold tightly around my eyes, and began to push and pull at me forcefully. I struggled to get free, using my power and my will. The fight only intensified. I was getting nowhere. I stopped. I surrendered to hell.
The energy of the womb immediately softened. I felt the Kundalini life force energy rising into me from the earth, orgasmic and ecstatic, and I started to enjoy the birthing process. It had moved quickly from struggle to ecstasy and bliss. I reflected later, that this is how birthing a child could be when we let go of resistance to pain and allow it to support the process.
As I surrendered, I partly and effortlessly half fell out of the womb. But things weren’t quite complete. There were still some fingers clawing at me, holding onto me with a reluctance to let go. I resolved not to fight at all, but to hold the energy of love and wait until these beings were ready to release me. I waited, and slowly and gently they fell away.
I was then free to be birthed fully, and my body fell out of the womb. As I emerged, I stood up. Kundalini energy surged through my body, shaking it from root to tip in an orgasmic riot of affirming life. I had arrived. And now, I knew how to get out of hell.